Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
and you fell through a lawn chair
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
