Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize