i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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