school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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