Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize