Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
