We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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