You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
