Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
