I hope mine doesn't look like that
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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