im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
