He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
