Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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