I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
foreskin is a definite game changer
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
