'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
