I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
