Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
All the doctor said was why
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
