So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
and you fell through a lawn chair
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
