I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
When are your genitals available?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
