The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
