i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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