i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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