Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize