better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
It's rum buckets o'clock
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
