no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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