maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
