You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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