is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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