so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
