i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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