Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
