she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
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