I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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