some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize