My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
