I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
