At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize