well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
