This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
