Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Who died my cat blue again?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
