Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Randomize
