how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
So apparently I’m into choking now
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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