So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
