oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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