He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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