Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
