How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize