White coat. Heels.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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