Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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