I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize