Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
