I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
